Tuesday, June 10, 2008

So the last day of school went well. We played and cleaned all day long. I got lots of hugs.

When I was assigned to this classroom at the beginning of my Junior year at Meredith, I was so disappointed. I wanted to be in an upper grades classroom. For a while there, I considered requesting a classroom switch. I'm so embarrassed that I voiced my concerns to people around me. I had prayed before that the Lord would place me in the classroom He wanted me to be in, so I stayed.

That first year, I quietly came in once a week and tutored and observed. I felt awkward-like I didn't belong there. Even last semester, when I was only coming in a couple hours a week, I felt odd. I just didn't have the time, and I didn't invest a lot. As you can imagine, I was terrified to begin student teaching. I was not looking forward to it. I sadly ended formal classes at Meredith to begin taking over the teaching in the classroom. I'm not sure when it all changed, or if gradually I realized it was not about me. I started laughing a lot more in class. I went to bed earlier so that I actually had energy to do my job. I finally got to know the kids. And I really had the most amazing teacher I have ever met. I think it was just a matter of getting acclimated to something unexpected. And getting over fears and silly worries and stubbornness.

Today, I was sad to see them go.

I will miss the little girl with a toothless smile who rubs my arms all day long. Even when I wear long sleeves, she will slide her little hand up my sleeve and incessantly rub my arms.

I will miss the little boy who calls my name out every 5 seconds, or the one who squirms all day long but will sit still when read to or hugged.

I will miss the ones who write such beautiful stories or tell funny things about their lives. Like the girl who was absent for a few days and came back to tell me "I had the virus and my leg hurted."

Or the one who said her favorite part of the Bible was the beginning, when "we got invented."

Or when, in our reading class, a little boy called it the "Table of Continents."

Or the girl who told us today, after we read Thank You, Mr. Falker, that she hated school last year and almost went a new school, but now she loves school.

I have so many wonderful stories, so many wonderful memories.

Sometimes, when I'm tired or it's been a terrible day, it's easy to forget why I chose this profession.

But thank the Lord, I did. He led me here. And I love it.

No comments: